The scene showed 3 disciplines losing their mentor who had been mentoring them since 10 years old.
I can't help but think of my parents. More than 8 years ago, I dream that I was at my parents' funeral. The dream repeated itself every night for a few weeks.
It was real every time.
I woke up in tears every time.
I told myself I am ready to embrace the truth should it happen. I attended it too many times.
I did everything within my means after that, to "repay my gratitude" to my parents. I really like my parents. I dare not say love as I feel I have not sacrifice enough for them. Both my mom and dad have their strengths and weaknesses. They are very adorable and understanding. They tried everything to help me.
I need to put a disclaimer at this point:
My dad would call me stupid when I was young. He would push me to my limits. He never gave me face even in public. He always says my other siblings are better and how much he loves them. He will never praise me or say I am a good daughter or have done well, in front of me. I am the only child to my mom and the 5th child to my dad.
Yes! I feel that he loves me because I have stayed with him in the last 35.5 years of my life and I know he has a tough front but soft on the inside. It took me 25 years to know this. He is a very private guy.
My mom is a sweetie pie. She never rejects me or treats me harshly, ever in my life. She will only think of solutions when I get into trouble. She will always be the first to lend me her hands or her shoulders.
I have done everything within my means. You can bet to defer if you know me.
I know that they are unique to me and no one can replace them. The comforting words and feeling they give me, whenever I am discouraged, is priceless!
I am a forward-looking person and on an emotional level, I always live in the present. I know I will be able to handle it when they are gone. In fact, I will be so calm that I think many will label me as a cold-blooded person. I am trained by them and through life I learn that
One Must Always Move Forward No Matter What Happens
as I know that is also what they will want to see of me.
I may tear 8 years ago, today or many days when my parents are around. But I will not want to feel sad when they are gone. As I know that I have already done everything I want to do with them, by then.
I am still guilty of not doing enough to many people who had helped me in my life. I am still trying and the list will never end. No man is an island. You cannot get things done without a lot of people around.
When I was 13 years old, I once passed a Chinese funeral with my dad. We saw a lot of paper house, paper maid, paper car, paper jewels and so on. He stopped and posed me a question "How do we know if the dead will be able to receive them?" I pondered and couldn't answer. He asked me "I wonder how they treat him before he/she died."
So, at this point of time, I want to write this down.
Cherish everyone around you.
Say thank you and show your gratitude as soon as you can.
We never know if we ever have a chance to say thank you if you don't do it today.
I am thankful to everyone in my life who has helped me and actually it does not really matter if they helped me because
sometimes I learnt when they treat me badly too
so I am still thankful for that. :))
I hope this blog will help someone. I do not know how it will but I hope it will.
If this blog does not help you, I thank you for spending a few minutes to read this.
I appreciate the audience.
So I have said my peace.
Good Night and till the next time! :D
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